be sure to stock up on your canned goods

Armageddon is coming. And I don't mean that Affleck flick with the big rocks from space (asteroids are soooo 1998). I am referring to that "other" armageddon...like the one that killed off the T-Rex and forced space aliens from Mars to breed a humanoid species to re-populate Earth. Believe it.

Despite what the coast to coast am crowd are claiming, the end of life as we know it is not going to be brought about by bird flu or some flavor of the week cataclysmic natural disaster. On the contrary, the end of the world is coming (to a town near me) in a much more subtle, yet much more sinister form. Joel Kliebe, dealer of hangover headaches and destroyer of friendships, is coming back to Chico to claim what is rightfully his (the two or three girls that he didn't sleep with when he lived here). So be sure to board up the windows in your house, say goodbye to your loved ones, and go on that rafting trip that you always wanted to take...because once November 2nd arrives, its all over.